Tuesday, February 26, 2008
My him.
I've been thinking for daysif i should tell him
how i feel about everything
over the past few mths,
or rather the year.
The day, i waited sho long.
I yearned to talk to him sho badly.
Just few days ago, it came true.
He talked to me.
Im glad of cos.
I told him, i missed him.
But, what he say is merely a 'arh?'
On the other hand, i wasnt as happy.
In fact, i face fear.
Im afraid of losing him again.
A used to be very close frined.
Someone, i trusted most.
Someone, who i share everything with.
Someone, who i once loved.
Losing a frined hurt most.
Just like losing anyone of the members in family.
Seriously, i got no idea.
No idea on how everything gets to this state.
He can forgive other, but why not me?
Like i told him, what kinda person i am,
he know best.
I nv hide anything from him, nor i lied to him.
He knew it too.
But why?
Why we are destined to be drifted off.
Unknowingly.
For sleepless nights, i've been thinking.
Should i tell him?? should i not?
Will i lost him again?
Or we are not even frineds?
He hates me?
I told myself,
not to teared over him.
But i still did.
Finally, i took up courage and asked.
I asked, do u hate me?
He answer, no.
Im glad hearing that. I really do.
He said, i chose to leave.
And i havent my own frineds now, and he have his.
But what are the circumstances behind of me leaving?
Have u give a thought about it?
What kinda person i am?
I told him frankly, how i feel.
He told me, i have hidden agendas.
NO i don. I just wanna visit frineds.
As simple as that.
Im not those ppl that play mind games.
I hated mind games most.
NO, im not that kinda person.
You should noe best
He told me, he wan frineds, but those friends that he cant trust.
My heart fell.
In your heart right now,
Im that kinda person.
It feels sho sucky.
Someone u cant trust.
But how?
i wanna noe how.
He didnt say much.
Only, that he didnt wanna care much.
Ever since i noe u,
I noe you're somebody different.
Way different from the others i noe.
And i swear, i dont treat u as those others.
I'm stilll the old same person.
I might have changed a lil,
due to every encounters i had
when your not with me.
But im very sure,
my heart towards u is still there.
you're sho cruel towards me.
Please do not leave or change.
You're different.
As always.
Miss you.
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