Sindy Says...: March 2007

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Feeling helpless and lonely in the middle of the night =(

My feelings are all mixed up. I feel sho helpless and lonely. Urging to talk to someone. Tat someone i get to noe online. He really noe wat im thinking or even wat im trying to say. He just understand. Maybe older guys can understand more? Maybe tats one of the point why i prefer older guys. =x

Im feeling as if i've lost something. But i don noe wat exactly it is. And im starting to miss lotsa things. Things tat i cant possibly get back. I miss my friends. My primary school friends, my secondary schood friends and my poly friends. Especially Jp and weilun. Wonder how are they doing at Laos. Hope everthing is fine and they are safe. I miss the days when i play with silly, Ryan,guildmates and pie. The days when i laugh like mad in sec sch. Disturbing friends,sitting in a circle and play together. Sho much fun i've lost and the laughter. It has been such a long long time when i really laugh out loud. I miss the feeling too.
Talked to my bestest friend in sec sch. It just feel like we just noe each other. A feeling of being very far apart. I feel lonely..

I need someone who can listen to me. Anyone.. anyone will do.. but who can? Can tat somebody bring me out of this darken and scary pit? please?
Now i really wonder wats happiness? Wat give us happiness? Wat actually is happiness?
I find everything boring. Nothing interesting me. Cant believe tat i could stare at the tv with some boring show. Can anyone bring back the old Sindy? the old Thistle? Bring back the smile she used to have. Im like a body without soul.

My colours have come to an end.
My world is dying, its perishing and its turning the other way round...

Friday, March 23, 2007

Please Colour my life!

Sad.. Sad.. Sad..
When will u let me off? What actually you want from me?
I didnt step on you or keep pestering you. In fact i didnt even talk to you more den 10 sentences or maybe 5. Why must u keep ruining my stuffs and make me feel horrible? Dont you find yourself cruel or even feel guilty for your actions towards a female? Can u call yourself a gentleman or a man? She don even bother you yet u wanna make her life miserable. Cold blooded! Im feeling really sucky now. My friend tried to speak up for me yet she received those kinda feedback. Really hurts me lot. Im feeling sorry. Im like dragging u down into the situation. Sorry! She have her own standing points! Being neutral? Or maybe you are now afraid and feeling bad cos somebody elses isnt siding you?

What you wan from me? your just my net friend.. Why must you care sho much? Did i bother your life or smth. If not why must u keep coming against me? You wont get to see hows my attitude like in real life. Sho why u bother killing your own healthy cells? My attitude, my way of life! Your attitude, your way of life! Yea.. you said " i am one who will always point out my friends " mistakes, correct them, and learn from their mistakes myself'.. Sorry for my opinion. you don seem to learn mistake as u don listen to others. Stucked at your point of view. In your earlier post u said 'everything have 2 stories' YES! theres 2 stories for everything. Yet you only get to noe one and u have sho much to comment. You say smth abt me like im always right others are wrong. Ya now you are right eh? I didnt noe tat insulting others is right too. Or even make ppl angry abd 'test' them. Somebody just didnt wanna admit it. I wonder wat kinda person are you.. You seems happy to make ppl angry and went around saying her attitude sucks. You feel happy eh? saddist! Ya i noe your not the only person online say i have attitude problem. Textual conversations maybe misunderstanding. Why not try asking my real life friends? Wat kinda friend am i?A comment from one friend is not enough you need more source to collect information.

My attitude. u think i really like being angry? Some things i don share. Or even problems im encountering tat make me vexed. Don say you alone.. Not even my siblings or parent noe wat im thinking. Comments? seem sho funny to me. If u really didnt noe tat much den just SHUT UP! To my friends im cheerful and a person who can share their secrets with. Im willing to play and not being sore. In my own mind i think of stuffs.. my problem which i hardly share.. Easily pissed? Yes! i have no patience and my temper shortens whenever im thinking of stuffs. Your every words may be harsh to me. And im defending for my own principles. You can say im wierdo. Watever i don care. Cos im a person of such. Why my friends can accpet me but not you?

You once told me. After u met certain incidents u den realise how wonderful life is and u must treasure it. But this doesnt seen in you. I don noe wats important to you in your life. But in my world friends are really important. Maybe you don think this way or even u think tat im just a used-to-be-close friend and its okie to lose one. To me its not! even this friendship had turn nasty but i still treat u as a friend. Of cos not as close as we used to be. But your still a friend to me! A friend tat i will never forget. Pooh chatted with me and he said. Human shouldn't hold grudges. Forgive and Not forget. Yes i strongly agree with pooh! We shouldn't hold grudges! This will stop us from moving forward and being sucessful. As for Forgive and Not Forget. I cant agree with it. I will forgive and forget the incident. Start Anew! Tats wat i aim for. But seems like i cant find this from you.

Apology? opps he said 'The apology is there. Whether you accept it or not it doesnt concern me.' den wat for you apologise? Just to make up a show? If sho be a drama king. I doubt you will be able to make it up to Hollywood.. -.-

No offence for watever i've posted. Thats how i feel towards the incident.
If your really coming against me pls don do it online. If u wan pls come talk to me one to one. Like you said its just a textual conversation. Words might be misunderstanding. Talking might helps. My phone will me on 24/7. Feel free to call. I believe you have the guts!

Myself, My post, My expression of feelings!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Recently have been feeling 'wierd' after certain incident happened. Lucky i have Rana to chat with and share. You really made my day Rana! =D After chatting with her really find tat shes sho sweet and i love her =D~
Rana sticks to me 24/7 during year end okies =D~

Actually i've type a post earlier on. But when i click publish.. THERES ERROR.. WAT THE HELL!! And i cant get back to it T~T Quite a long one leh and got feelings inside de. Due to the error shellythistle cannot post T~T and its too long sho forget it. Maybe when the anger is back, i will be able to produce the post again.. x.x anyways its kinda late. i got to go T~T
TATA NITES!
BIG BEAR BEAR IM COMING!!! =D

My effort G.O.N.E.S HOOOOO~

Monday, March 19, 2007

Sometimes Shellythistle Wonder...

Sometimes i wonder.. how come there are always ups and down in a life?

Sometimes i wonder.. how come human can be sho cruel to each other?

Sometimes i wonder.. why would ppl bring u up to the sky and make u fall again?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be love?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be gender?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be problem?

Sometimes i wonder.. how wonderful life is?

Sometimes i wonder.. why would some ppl love to insult others?

Sometimes i wonder.. by insulting others do they feel guilty or they are happy?

Sometimes i wonder.. who is he to test me or wan to change me of who i am?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat really love is?

Sometimes i wonder.. how would someone hurt somebody tat he/she loves?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be secrets?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human just like to avoid question?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human just cant be bother with how others may feel?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human can be sho selfish, sho self centered?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat actually feelings are?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat actually friends or lovers are for?

Sometimes i wonder.. how come somebody cos of materialistic and realistic they can cheat feelings?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must we make friends?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human cannot be frank to each other?

sometimes i wonder.. wat actually is tat person thinking?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat is the best way to solve problems?

Sometimes i wonder.. can friend really be trusted?

Sometimes i wonder.. how come things will turn nasty between friends?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat is he/she trying to do?

Sometimes i wonder.. why dont i just leave the world, probs may be solved?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be temper?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be anger?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must there be hatred?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must we care and look out for each other?

Sometimes i wonder.. how dangerous can a human be?

Sometimes i wonder.. how ugly can a human be in the inner?

Sometimes i wonder.. who don ppl just appreciate wat they have?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat are you thinking?

Sometimes i wonder.. how can i bear to see you walking towards fire pit?

Sometimes i wonder.. did u get wat i told u previously?

Sometimes i wonder.. why you just wanna get yourself into trouble?

Sometimes i wonder.. when will u wanna end it?

Sometimes i wonder.. you find it fun to cheat others feelings to satisfy yourself?

Sometimes i wonder.. till when will u stop doing tat action?

Sometimes i wonder.. why must you make up stories to gain sympathy?

Sometimes i wonder.. when will human stop evil doings?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human expect more from others?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human just like to collect instead of contributing?

Sometimes i wonder.. why human just like to make use of others to archieve
their goals?

Sometimes i wonder.. wat is the purpose of respecting others when he don respect u as a friend?

Sometimes i wonder.. Sometimes i wonder..

Everyone in the map have eyes to see wat happened tat night.No point twisting your words.If you wanna ruin my reputation, pls go ahead as i will make sure tat yours wouldnt be perfect too.This aint threatening. Its something tat i learn from a beloved 'friend' of mine.

You deserve my respect no more.

Respect yourself, Respect others.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Sweet tweet memories <3

Recently i've been doing lotsa things and met lotsa friends who i havent been meeting them for as long as i graduate after secondary school. They really brighten up my days hehe.. Thx thx! Especially my bby =D He brought me out and experienced lotsa things tat i will never never do it. hehe Really enjoy being with him =D *hugs*

Monday 12th Mar 2007

1st date with bby =D
We went Grand Cathay to catch 300! WOOTS! nice movie! =D *2 THUMBS UP!* If theres another chance i will wanna watch it again =D *horspringyspringspringnekonkooohorhorhor* When i tell bby the show is nice he replied "nice meh?" ROAR! YOU MUST SAY ITS NICE COS I SAY SHO! xDD ROARRRRR!!

I bought the tickets xD we were afraid tat if bby buy it he might not get through cos 300 is a M18 movie and bby isnt 18 yet. *nods nods im older T~T by few mths only nor =x*
Grabbed our Popcorns and drinks and headed to the theater hall.
Roughly 10 mins or so after the movie start.. Shellythistle heard someone snore.. x.x sho she turned to her left and saw this auntie sleeping and she snored softly. okie okiee. maybe after working u might be tired but its 3pm in the noon O_O work? maybe shes not interested in the show but was there to accompany her hubby. Never mind.. her hubby woke her up.. but shortly later, Shellythistle heard her snoring again.. this time she turned to her right and tell bby abt it. Both of them ignored and continue staring at the screen. However, Shelly was thinking how chould she sleep with such wonderful and exciting film? TSK! cannot make it.. never mind watever. she slp her way i watch my show. Finally quiet down.. shelly tot tat auntie must have gain interest in the show too.. but NOT! this time round she snored louder and continuously.. bby heard it too xD both of us start giggling and people infront turned back to look at tat auntie. lmao.. -.- okie okie maybe this time round auntie really awake xD we didnt hear her snore anymore. TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!!

Next we went walking around in town.. walk walk walk look look look.. my heels pain pain pain~ arrrrrgh! T~T entering shopping malls and exiting.. lol until shaw house resting at taco bell. Shelly's blister really super painful.. she need plasters.. Sho bby went out to search for me. *touched* waited quite long cos Shaw house doesnt have a pharmacy and bby have to go else where to get 1 for me.. *touched touched* i went pasting pasting.. but its still hurts.. the sticky part of the plaster pulled my skin up together with the friction.. PAIN! no matter how much plaster i paste it still hurts.. T~T nvm still can walk. sho we walked to cineleisure for movie #2. But we are unable to catch it cos its rather late when the show ends.. shooooo we went pool xD Shellythistle super noob at it can? xD bby taught me how to break balls but somehow my balls doesnt break nicely xD its still fun! fruitful experience *bby next time bring me go play pool again!* =D hehehe he said i need more practise xD~ after tat he walked me to Mrt station and we headed home~ hehe <3

Happiness didnt end tat day <3

Thursday 15th Mar 2007

Shellythistle had a seconday school gathering~ FWEEEEEEE! im sad and happy at the same time. Sad becos alot of them turned down. Reason given : im quite broke.. okie okie its okie theres still more time to meet up. End up only 4 of us lol but nice =D
Happy becos finally met them and cos bby did as wat he promise =D

We went Seoul Garden-ing =D chatted alot. really miss those crazy days in sec sch =D
After tat went to catch the 2nd movie of the week. The messenger. Quite nice not bad.
Bby joined us too! =D hehe never thought he will agree to join the 4 gers lol really glad he appeared <3
Wonder wats bby thinking..he laughed during the show. But it isnt funny its scaaarryyy. He told me whenever thrs scary parts the chair will shake tats why he laughed... x.x cos the row of us will scream and shelly covered her eyes.. okie! tats the funny part for him norr lol. After tat we went back home. My place is sho far away from bbys.. we cant go home tgt. only can say bye bye at train stations and bus interchange sob sob.

Friday 16th Mar 2007

In the morning bby needa settle stuff for his bro in town. After tat hes free sho he msged me if i wanna meet him afterwards. End up meeting at J8 to catch the 3rd movie for the week. xD Jus follow law. hmm quite a lame show =x While waiting for bby outside the cinema, i saw my frend yunxuan~ WHEEE!!! =D~ hehe sho happy! if i didnt meet up with bby i wouldnt meet her too xD hehe
After tat we went for dinner and went arcade. xD bby tried kiap-ing the pooh bear bear. after several attempts he gave up lol its okie bby! i rather i use the money on smth else useful! =) Really got nothing to do in J8 sho we went Ang Mo Kio =D
Bby brought me to Lan. My first time there. Played House of the dead xD Really fun. Bby told me see anything just shoot. sho i did wat he said. shoot shoot shoooot! Played CS too.. really don noe wats going on. Before i can shoot, my char already lie dead on floor x.x people come into our room and left =x must be becos i too noob xD lol sorry~
Left Lan when it almost strike 10. Grab ourselves bubble tea from the hub and sat outside NewYork NewYork for a chat. lol why not inside? T~T
Time to go home~ walked to Mrt station and met one of his frend thr lol
I dropped off at Yck and bby continue his journey~

WOOTS! gonna meet again on the comming wednesday. =D
hehe bby bringing me to time zone yishun to win big bear bear home WHEEEE!! <3
Looking forward to Chik Java and Mt Faber trip too =D~

This post is rather long but my memories are kept xD
Gotta catch my last few episode of Yakitate Japan! =D
Tata everyone!
Nights!

<3-ed
Im happy yet theres still more other things to settle..
Im being unfair to others..
Im Sorry..

Thursday, March 8, 2007

I don't have legs O.O

WHEEEEE!! been sho long ever since i step into the gym.
Wednesday 08/03/07, 8.30 Pm, Shellythistle stepped into the gym!
hehehe.. Today Neko and me went for Pilates.Actually we should be going for Bodyjam and pilates in mellinia walk Fitness First.

Thx to Shellythistle. she was sho late =x sho we missed bodyjam T~T (i miss the dance) As Pilates stars at 8.40 sho neko and shelly went to nearby 'KouFu' (a coffee shop) for desserts.
we went to change and waited outside the studio bare feeted =x for the instructor Serena to get ready. Shes one of the instructor i like =D very friendly and laugh alot hehe. Her training not bad too.

Normally we attend her Bodyjam very saturday keke *Spanish Salsa HA!* Serena can really dance nor very nice too. *thumbs up* Neko and friends agreed too. Tat time QQ suggested all the instructors should form a group and join Singapore DanceFloor xD *nods head* Usually we only attend BodyCombat, Bodyjam, BodyBalance and swimming. ShellyThistle tried Pilates for the first time and its really killing her x.x wonder if she will wanna go for it again LOL
In fact its not tat bad too maybe for the first time its #$%*! kinda tough xD All we did for tat hour is STRETCH AND STRETCH mORE STRETCH. BREATH BREATH BREATH. REACH OUT, REACH REACH REACH. FEEL TALL. and Hands keep shaking for shelly. xD Not enough endurance and stamina yet lol keep shaking xD really tiring.. after everything i seriously feel like sitting on the mat. Dint wanna stand up cos my lower body is like sho heavy x.x when i walked i don feel like i do have a pair of legs O_O SOUR FEELING! x.x hope tomorrow will be better hehe.

hmm tats all for today =D
tata everyone!

I seriously don't know what exactly you're going to do next..
What's your decision?
This is still for you!

Saturday, March 3, 2007

My day goes @_@ blur o.o

SADED! Shellythistle din manage to collect her specs as its still not ready for collection yet.. =(
WORST MORE! before tat, my beloved sister, known as twinkle or winter was sho blur..
following are wat shellythistle did last night....

#1 msged winter.. confirm her the time we meeting and the venue

#2 i rushed to Hougang point,the place we decided to meet.. and i rushed thr becos someone told me shes going off to take bus.. and her woking place is quite near and im afraid i will be late..

#3 reach my destination.. i called winter.. yet she tell me shes still waiting for bus.. -.- ( i seriously don like to wait for ppl a short while is alright but someone do things very slowly and i hate it!.. anyways.. im always late =x)

#4 sho shellythistle walked to the bus stop where winter will drop off.

#5 waited for winter and its drizzling -.-

#6 finally shes here and we enter Hougang point to draw money before going for dinner

#7 at the ATM machine.. somebody realised she left her purse in office

#8 we walked all the way home to get the car (couldent take bus to her work place cos shellythistle didnt bring anything only receipt for specs)

#9 went back home to get car keys (make me feel as if i went to fetch winter after work)

#10 went to winters workplace..

#11 shellythistle waited for winter in the car behind the small alley.. scary can?

#12 as usual winter is slow.. shellythistle sang in the car to kill boredom

#13 after winter is done we went Hougang Point KFC.. and we da pao-ed

#14 after tat we went fairprice to get some snacks for todays gathering (sho funny la.. should have gone to fairprice before da pao-ing -.-)

#15 FINALLY! we proceed to the optician

#16 and shellythistle heartbreak

#17 watched winter trying her new glasses

#18 went to rent show for my dad (end up renting 3 shows for ourselves as the show my dad wants is unavailable. They are Devil wears Prada, Step up and Gigolo wannabe)

#19 went home.. found out neko already asleep..

#20 enjoyed our dinner while watching Devil wears Prada

#21 talk to bby

#22 went maple to disturb frends

#23 end up talking on phone again.. its like both of us in the same map and we are talking on phone -.-

#24 cos tat frend of mine meeting his frend for supper sho we both go offline

#25 Shellythistle went orh orh-ing

tats wat boring shelly did last night and today~ CROWDED CROWDED! hehe relatives and friends are coming =D
no doubt neko's cough shes still super active on the majong table xD~ HUAT AR! $.$
have to go off le.. see you guys =(
Shellythistle will still be counting down to her specs collection T~T
tata~

Do it your way.. Do it slowly..
Im not sure if you get wat i mean.. but still take what i told you seriously..

Friday, March 2, 2007

Genki ja nai~

Really getting bored at home..
slacking.. hiding in the super messy room.. doing nothing.. opps i mean nothing interesting to do..
really hope my new storage bed is here now.. sho i can keep my room..
but even if my bed is here.. will i kep my stuffs? =x lazy.. xD
messy messy mESSY!!! bored.. genki ja nai..
really hope im in school now..
but whenever im in school i'll hope thrs holiday.. think everyone has the same thought too lol
i miss all my friends.. Jp, Ross, weilun and yoshi.. miss those fun..

BUT NEVERMIND!
Tomorrow will be an interestering and exciting day!
wahahhahahah
cos Fen, QQ, Pauline and Qin is coming over~ FWEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
-chanting- *majongmajongmajongmajong* HUAT AR! F5!

1736.. few more hours to go and im able to collect my specs~ WOOOOOOOTS!
sho happy hehehhehehe..
but im sho sleepy now.. slept late last night again.. but its okie.
i find it worthy still.. =D
sho sleepy now.. im like semi-brain close... been repeatedly doing the same things.. but i don really remember i've done it few hours ago...
lost memory wahahahha

Shellythistle feel like buying colouring book and colour at home hehehe or do some handicrafts also xD just get something to keep herself busy.. hehe..
okie le got to go bathe =x meet winter later YOHOOOOOOO! hehehhe
tata tata will be back to post my new specs xD
tata everyone!

Save yourself by remembering what i said..
Leave..

!! 2nd march! YA HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

WHEEEEEEEEE!!
2nd march 2nd march!! WOOTS WOOTS!
keke collect glasses collect glasses! xD~ hehehe
time really flies~

harr~ i feel sho shiok now! feeling sho happy and excited till i cant sleep fweee~~
hehe.. today.. MUAAAAHAHAHAHAHA.. finally spoke my mind.. hope it really helps.. and watched Ricky Martin MTV unplugged! WOOOOOOOOTS! feeling SEXY AND HAWT!!
really make shellthistle dance! *spanish salsa*
and due to boredom again..
shellythistle went seaching for Ricky Martin's picture muahaha =D~
and some reasons why shellythistle like him =x MAN MAN MAN!

Hawt sexy back! * drools* Mtv Unplugged

Nice tatoos! sho man~

Wide and sexy smiles =D

Well known for his sexy pipi xD~ YA HOOOOOOO!

He dance really well! and hes HOT! Nice bodyline! SECKSY! MAN!

Now even im sick too.. irregular sleep make me headache..
ate pain killer yet no improvements.. help~~ ahhh!!
doubts cleared! hope i can sleep better tonight..
and hope it clears your doubts too. pls really really take care! =) <3

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO PAULINE TOO! =D

Happy birthday to you~
Happy birthday to you~
Happy birthday to pauline~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!! =D

And everyone pls take care.. weather changing really fast..
remeber to drink more water and advoid heaty food! =D
kinda tired.. got to go! no Japan tonight =x or maybe 1 episode xD
tata nights!

Get blinded no more..
For whatever i said, hope u can see through...